Reasons why PHP can blow me:
1) register_global=Off. This should still register session globals into the local scope. You can cheat this by simply using the following code:

foreach ( array_keys( $_SESSION ) as $key ) {
$$key =& $_SESSION[$key];
}

The '&' is important, so you if you change the local variable it will be reflected in the _SESSION array.

2) I am the only person alive who can poison it's stack/heap/whatever. I get these wonderful errors like ' Failed opening required 'debtgroup.clacs.php' on like xxx, while on line xxx it is spelled debtgroup.class.php.

3) The lack of private variables and methods in it's object system. That's as retarded as perl allowing access to the symbol table.

Ok, I'm done.

So I don't usually talk about my birthday because I don't celebrate it, but I just found this funny. So last thursday was National Depression Screening Day. That happened to coincide with my 30th birthday. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

Have you ever cut yourself, I mean not on accident? Drawn the sharp blade across your skin and watched the blood bubble out? Have you ever done that?

I would like to propose a toast to all the special 'F' words...
Friends
Family
Fate
Forgiveness
and Forever...

that's from My First Mister. I just had to watch it a second time. It's that good, honestly.

I just finished watching My First Mister, and I highly recommend it. It's so funny and touching and bittersweet. If you have ever felt unloved or lonely, then this movie is for you.

Only you can Help Walter get Laid.

• Tips on finding models
• What content sells best
• How to get started on your first shoot
• How to stay legal
• Where to sell your content
• How to find and qualify distributors for your product
• Everything you need to know to start making money in this industry immediately
• Reprintable U.S.C 2257 Disclosure Document
• Reprintable Model Release Forms

Well, that last post left a little to be desired, didn't it. I guess a bit of explanation is in order here.
In case you haven't figured it out by now, I'm a drama queen. I was notified of this by an ex-coworker, who has since moved off to california to do whatever people do there when they get fed up with the mid-west. I'm not one to criticise though. I'm close enough to the left coast, and for the longest time I had myself convinced that I moved out here for love, when it was really just drama. And by now I have rejected or neglected every friend who gave a shit, so I am left alone with my drama. I can see now that it gets old pretty fast.
With no drama of my own, and no one around with drama I can immerse myself in, I spend an awful lot of time alone, drinking and trying to concoct some drama to keep me occupied. But that is getting tiresome, because if no one is around to experience your drama with you, is it really drama, or just delusion.

sidenote: I have just noticed that I can construct a pretty long rambling sentence.

Now that I have noticed this sidenote, I seem to have lost the track that I was on. More later, maybe.

Well, who gives a shit, you know?

A New Life, Soaked in Flammable Liquid
I weep for the future.

Link via jwz